Saturday, July 18, 2015

Our babies gender and the IVF to chose controversy

07/18/2015

Three days ago we found out what we were having! As predicted my stubborn little sweetheart wasn't helping us get a good shot but we finally got one showing three little lines, which means she is a she! I have felt strongly this one was a girl, but I have also always wanted a little girl so to know I was actually correct and not just overly hopeful is great!

We need to name our little bean so please feel free to leave suggestions!


                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              

This post isn't just to share our news though, I just read an article here about using IVF to select a babies gender. I wanted to share my thoughts on this article since most people commenting on the article have dealt with miscarriages or infertility and are irritated with the way this couple chose to use IVF to make sure they had a daughter this time.

This couple spent $100,000 to have a baby girl, despite not having ANY infertility issues. I'm not trying to be judgmental but I really wonder why they didn't adopt? I know adoption takes time but so does IVF and pregnancy, and they already had two biological children... I'm a big believer in adoption and I'm against people having more than two biological children because there are SOO many people already and so many children that need adopted, it just seems selfish and egotistical that you NEED to have children that share your biology, do you believe your genetics are so superior?

The issue most people have is them using the IVF to chose gender. I'm thrilled I'm having a girl! I always wanted one since I was a little girl I have dreamed about being a mother and having a little girl! I guess I can understand where this women is coming from. To me having a healthy baby was the MOST important thing. When we had our ultrasound where the dr could tell us the gender we wanted to know but I wasn't super concerned with it being a girl or boy because we had a scare and that brought me to the realization that I really didn't care as long as it was healthy! We are planning to have a boy in the future still, and we are going to adopt! Adoption has always been something important to me and it allows you to chose gender. I've always wanted a little girl and my husband wanted a little boy, while he is thrilled we are having a girl in the future we do want a boy to finish our family!

I personally don't have religious objections to gender based IVF.

I am pro-choice because I am pro-baby, I care more about the life that child will have if concieved and brought into the world than just trying to force people who become pregnant (either by accident or stupidity) to carry the child til birth. Many pro-lifers I have talked to are NOT willing to adopt, saying it isn't their responsibility to care for the child they are trying to mandate be brought into the world. Many also believe the biological parents who got knocked up by being irresponsible should take on the responsibility of raising that child? That doesn't make since to me! They have already shown they aren't responsible and being a parent is a HUGE responsibility...

I know, I know... I got off topic, I brought up being pro-choice though to explain that I am pro family planning. I want each baby brought into this world to have a family who loves and cares for them! Some people REALLY want a baby girl or a baby boy. I know many families who kept having children until they got their desired gender. Yes they raised the extra children, but with today's technology why not?

I would prefer people who want a specific gender adopt rather than turn to IVF... but I'd also prefer people who want large families to adopt, and those who want to adopt! I'm all for every child having a loving home! At the end of the day isn't that what is most important?